Thriving & Celebrating Life...

Food is something I love, more of a passion actually.  I love cooking, baking, experiment new recipes, enjoy feeding my family & friends and savour the taste.  Having cancer changed me.  This new chapter of my life has changed my eating habit tremendously. I have read books, blogs, watched youtube, listened to different doctors & nurses, other cancer thrivers, here's what I learnt. One thing to note.  Please eat regularly, do not skip meals.  Remember, you need lots of energy to fight! Sugar is off-limits Sugar feeds cancer.  One of the way to fight this is to starve cancer cells and the best is to cut sugar off completely.  Some say it can be substituted with honey, but it is debatable as honey is high in enzyme and natural sugar.  It is great for cancer prevention but once cancer has surfaced, avoid honey at all cost. Meat is a no-no Cancer thrives in acidic environment and meat is acidic.  It is important to avoid meat of a...

Everyone face different side effects after Chemotherapy.  Mine differs after every cycle. Here goes the list.  I am still going through my cycles, so the list will grow, I'm sure. Mouth ulcers.  Oh boy this is the one I hate.  It's painful even when I open my mouth.  Couldn't talk properly.  Luckily a friend recommended GelClair - a mouthwash specially formulated for cancer patients.  It worked like a charm!   Rashes - I have rashes all over my body.  It appeared bit by bit and one day you realize that they are everywhere!  Only way to overcome it is lots of patience and apply ointments diligently.  I also take drowsy anti-itch pills at night so I don;t spend the night scratching. Pimples - this one is bad for me, I never have pimples this much growing up, so it lowers down my self esteem a great deal.  But again, patience is the only friend I have. Hair loss - inevitable.  2 weeks after my first chemo, I play...

What do I bring to my chemo sessions?  A series of stuff! At least 2 litres of water to get me through the day. Some healthy munchies - steamed sweet potato, organic eggs and almonds will be good A thermos of green tea, this will calm you down A pair of cool socks, coz you might get the chills, and one should only wear cool stuff A nice comfy soft jacket A good book - you will have a lot of time to kill An iPad, or tab (with a good headphone) where you can watch a movie - you will have time for a movie  Lotion to keep your skin hydrated Lip balm - coz you want your lips to be hydrated and look good while pumping drugs into your body of course! A nice calming essential oil that you can smell - great if you have a necklace or bracelet diffuser.  I love Geranium, it makes me feel happy and I always have peppermint with me, just in case I feel nauseous (so far so good)    Wear comfy loose clothes A notebook and pen - so you can write whatever thoughts...

So here's the thing.  I'm afraid of needles.  Really really afraid.  Since I was a little girl.  The thought of having needles poked into me month after month with poison pouring into me gives me the creeps.  I am seriously not looking forward to this.  And I haven't even thought of the side effects!  Man, I have watched countless movies and all those movies with cancer in it is like a bloody horror stories!  And I have some experiences with cancer among people that are close to me.  I know what to expect. It's not going to be pretty. The morning of chemo, I had butterflies in my stomach.  I can't eat, can't drink, can't do anything. Walked into Oncology in a daze.  Saw other patients, all thin and bald.  Is this what I'll become?  The lady next to me was being poked for her chemo, and she screamed.  Seems that her veins have hardened due to the previous cycles of chemotherapy.  That freaked me out, man!  ...

So I was referred to Gleneagles Oncology - Dr Rachael Khong. To be honest I'm hoping to hear from Institut Kanser Negara as I heard good things about their drugs and facilities. Prof Yip even called them to refer me but after a week, I still don't hear from them. I don't want to delay things, so Gleneagles it is. Made an appointment to see her to hear her treatment plan for me. I also made another appointment with UMSC oncology to compare the treatment. The day I met up with Dr Rachael, Azwat was busy with meetings. He wanted to ask for emergency leave but i told him absolutely no. He has missed a lot of work last week because of me, so better not jeopardise his work. I have the lovely Jaime to come along with me to see Dr Rachael. It was quite a long wait as we were told she has 10 patients that morning itself.  But the moment we saw her, we liked her.  She was open and easy to talk to.  And reminds me of Jaime and I - loud!  I had a series of questions...

I've been reminded today, that my world is not ending.  Oh yeah, the Big C is in me, but there are so many things to be grateful of, and I thank Allah for this.   Let's see some of the things I'm blessed with: Being alive I have the best mom in the world I had the best dad in the world, Allah bless his soul I have the best husband in the universe - he is funny, loving, romantic, and I love his determination. I have great brother and sister in law, with lovable kids.  Love them to bits My mom in law is always kind to me I've been blessed with good health all my life (till now) I have a good job that pays the bills and some splurge once in a while I cook well (that works since I love food soon much!) I'm a good baker, although cake decorating is not really my thing I have a good comfortable home  I have wonderful friends - from childhood friends, to teenage friends, college friends, ex & current colleagues. All my mistakes - I learnt from them ...

There are so many things I want to do in this life, so I'm writing a list of things I need to do and finish, while I go through this fight.  Not in order. 1.  Go to the Hajj (Dear Allah, please grant me this wish) 2.  Watch the end of Game of Thrones 3.  Trip to Krabi with Azwat and do the rock climbing 4.  Keep baking cakes (even though sugar is now off-limits for me) 5.  Watch Star Wars! 6.  Adopt a baby, someone I will love with all my heart 7.  More run & bike with Azwat 8.  Learn swimming 9.  Enter a triathlon 10. Start & finish the miniature house I bought in Osaka 11. Read the Quran fluently 12. Love, care and look after Azwat till the end of our lives 13. Help the poor, less fortunate with my dear Suzana (will write about her) 14. Ensure Jaime is doing ok, with someone who loves her (someone who deserves her!) More to come. Forever